You're My Floatie
by OneAbsurdMentality
Summary: Dean gets tired of keeping up a strong facade, and Castiel is there to help him through it. "You're like my floatie..." (Oneshot / Destiel / Fluff)


Hello there~  
This is my second fanfiction and yes, it is another oneshot, and yes, it is fluffy. I just can't help it, they're so cute! It was also supposed to be so much more lighthearted. Oh well, I like how it turned out.  
This takes place awhile after Dean gets out of Hell, but before they defeat Lucifer.  
Alright, I'm tired so I'm gonna leave it at that.  
As always I do not own SPN or the characters.  
Hope you enjoy reading!

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Dean had his bad days. I mean, come on, everyone did and he decided that someone who had been to Hell and was now on every creature's kill list had slightly more of a right to get upset and breakdown then most. However he was Dean Winchester, and he'd be damned before he broke the sarcastic facade and let his true feelings show, especially on a bad day like today.

Dean ran a hand down his face and heaved a sigh, glancing in the mirror to make sure he didn't look like he had been crying. Other then his mussed hair and his glassy eyes, he looked okay. Mentally kicking himself for allowing tears to fall, even when he was alone, Dean opened the door to the bathroom and stepped into the dingy motel room that he shared with Castiel.

The angel had no need to sleep, but he insisted upon remaining with Dean to watch over him as he did so. The hunter knew that he would be fine, but he kind of liked having the angel there in his bed, giving him extra warmth and comfort through his unwavering presence. Dean would never admit this, even though they were in a relationship now. Or at least that's what Sam called it. The man who had tortured in Hell and the angel who betrayed his family had kissed one night when Dean had been drunk and upset, and when Dean sobered up, it was as though an unspoken change had made itself known between them. They'd kissed a couple more times over the period of the next few days, and Castiel unconsciously remained closer to the hunter's side then before.

The dark haired, blue-eyed angel swiftly turned his gaze to face Dean as the hunter walked up to where he was sitting on the bed. Dean gave him a thin smile and Cas' eyes narrowed in concern as he took in the hunter's forlorn appearance. He knew that Dean had been upset for about an hour previous to this moment, but the seraph knew that he preferred not to discuss his emotions, and had refrained from inquiring what was wrong. Now though, Castiel feared that Dean might have been feeling even worse then he had known.  
"Dean, are you well?" Castiel asked, squinting at Dean as he perched next to him on the mattress. The hunter glanced at him with tired forest green eyes.

"'Course I'm fine, why?" Came the short response, gruff with tension as the angel strayed onto territory that Dean didn't want him to.  
"You look ill," Castiel responded, lifting a hand to press it against Dean's forehead. The hunter shifted back and Cas' hand fell away as Dean frowned at him irritably.

"I said I'm fine." He snapped, and Castiel flickered his gaze to his knees, looking very much chastened.  
The hunter shook his head as if to clear it and sighed heavily, grasping Castiel's chin and angling his head to tilt upwards so he could press a light kiss on his chapped lips. The seraph responded in kind, pressing his lips against Dean's softly as he hesitantly wrapped his arms around his waist, still uncertain about the motions of showing affection through contact. After a relaxed moment they broke apart.  
"I'm sorry Cas," Dean remarked sheepishly, his gaze dropping from Castiel's searching eyes and down to the carpet, "I know you're worried, but I'm fine."

"You forget that I can read your mind Dean. You're upset." Castiel responded sternly, his tone leaving no room for the hunter to argue his innocence, but his tone was also soft and his eyes, though searching, showed how much he cared for the other.  
Dean opened his mouth to respond with a snappy retort that Cas should just get the hell out of his head, but Castiel spoke first, words quiet.  
"What's wrong Dean?" He asked simply, but he knew how long the hunter had been waiting for this moment, for someone to notice that there was something was wrong with him and hound him until he responded. Dean's gaze raised to meet Cas', and the angel noticed the pain lingering on the edges of the dark irises.

"I'm tired, Cas... I'm just..." His voice was soft, so soft that if Castiel hadn't been an angel, he would have had to strain to hear the mummered words. The seraph had heard what Dean had said with no problem, however, and he gently placed his hand on the hunter's knee, offering silent support that seemed to spur him on.

"Everyone- You, Sam, you all just keep dying and I'm scared, I'm so scared that one of the times you get killed there won't be a second chance, and I won't be able to do a damn thing about it. We keep fighting Castiel, but for what? Every time we cut the head off the snake it grows five more and we have to get rid of those too, but it will just keep growing more until we're dead. I have to stop the friggin' apocalypse and Lucifer without saying yes to Michael and allowing those dicks with wings to kill off half the planet, oh, and I have to stop my little brother from going darkside, either from saying yes to Lucifer or from becoming a demon blood junkie again, and I'm just..." His voice dropped, cracked, his eyes squeezed shut as he took a steadying breath and gripped onto Cas' hand. He let out the breath as he opened his eyes, shining with tears that he was too proud to let fall, "I'm just so tired, Cas." He finished quietly, swallowing past the lump that had formed in his throat.

Castiel was unsure how to respond. He knew that he needed to comfort the hunter, to give him reassurance, to tell him that everything was going to be alright, but how could he? He didn't know that it would be, but he did know that the odds facing them were almost insurmountable. He opened his mouth to speak, to reassure, but the words died on his tongue and his breath hitched as he stared into Dean's broken gaze, imploring him to give him comfort.

Determination settled on Castiel's features and he pulled the hunter into him, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close, securing his chin tightly on the other's shoulder. Dean was shocked but allowed himself to be pulled, and when Cas fitted himself against him and held him tightly in a warm embrace, he wasn't going to argue. The hunter's jaw clenched as he buried his face in the angel's shoulder, and a tear escaped from his closed eye and rolled down his cheek as he took in a shaking breath, his hands fisting around the material of Cas' trench coat.  
"It's going to be okay Dean," Castiel whispered, one of his hands finding Dean's head and beginning to card through his hair slowly, the other hand splayed firmly on his middle back, pressing him protectively against the angel. Knowing he couldn't trust his voice at the moment, Dean responded by jerking his head in a quick nod, shuddering as he clutched at the trench coat between his fingers tighter until his knuckles turned white.  
"Don't ever leave me Cas... You-" Castiel was silent as the hunter tried to find the right words he was searching for, "You're like my floatie, my boat, the thing that keeps me above water when I'm about to drown. I can't- I can't go on without you, so please don't leave me," Dean begged quietly, and Cas responded by setting both hands firmly on the hunter's back and drawing him in as close as he could.  
"I won't Dean. I promise, I won't leave you."

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I'm so happy with how this turned out, I think they remained in character for at least the most part. I thought that it was entirely plausible that Dean has secret breakdowns from everything he goes through because he always acts so tough and takes everything in stride, but it has to wear down on him. And Castiel has to be there to comfort him of course.  
Anywho, please review, it keeps me writing, and give me any helpful criticism you can think of!  
As always, thanks for reading!  
~OneAbsurdMentality


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